So, get this: a heavy metal singer, OnlyFans model, and Jesus walk into a bar and sit down at a table.

“I’ll have a beer,” says the singer. “I’ll take a Martini, dirty,” says the OF model. “Well,” Jesus begins with a mischievous glint in his eye, “I guess I’ll take a water.”

While they’re waiting for their drinks, the topic of “happiness” comes up.

“It’s about embracing the highs and the lows,” the singer starts, “some days life sucks; other days, it’s beautiful–lean into it all and be real about it.”

“Me, I’m after the highs,” the OF model explains, “Life’s too short to be bored or not have fun, so I’m after whatever makes me feel good, free, and fun.”

Jesus listens and speaks last. “It sounds like both of you are after something you can fully experience, but I have a question.” Everyone puts their drinks down and stares at the bearded fellow, “What do each of your pathways give to the world?”

Happiness + “The Good Life”

When people in the West talk about happiness, we typically frame it in the following way:

Individual, self-fulfillment that relies on my ability to get what I want, feel what I want, and be what I want.

What do you notice about that definition?

• It’s focus is on the individual
• It’s about what we can consume or get for ourselves
• It puts people at the center of the universe

If you’re watching a TV commercial, listening to an ad, or paying attention to the invitation of influencers, you’ll hear this general description of happiness over and over again. And it begs the question:

Is this Western depiction of “happiness” REALLY the path of human flourishing?

OnlyFans on Happiness

English podcaster and wisdom-seeker Chris Williamson recently hosted a roundtable discussion on “The Modern Sex Work Debate,” that mimics the bar scene depicted earlier. Williamson interviewed the author of the book, The Case Against the Sexual Revolution, Louise Perry, alongside OnlyFans model and controversial social media star Bonnie Blue.

The podcast is not for the faint of heart and is quite graphic at points, but certainly enlightening when it comes to the subject of “happiness.” When pressed by Perry and Williamson as to why Bonnie Blue chose a life of “sex work,” Blue had this to say:

“The biggest thing in life is to be happy…as long as each day I’m waking up happy and going to sleep happy, I’ll be proud of myself.”

As the interview goes on, it becomes clear that Blue is radically individualistic. She is unable to see how her work in online porn might negatively affect others or have an impact on Western culture, despite her vast popularity and influence.

Returning to our definition of happiness, Bonnie Blue perfectly embodies the individualistic, “get-what-I-can-while-I-can” attitude towards “the good life.” And her life is built around her: her desires, brand, wealth, success, and happiness.

All Out Life

In our bar scene metaphor, what would the other two patrons—the heavy metal singer and Jesus—have to say about the path to happiness?

You might be shocked to learn the band Slipknot and the Messiah Jesus have a lot in common when it comes to pursuing the good life.

In the song, “All Out Life,” the masked, roaring lead singer Corey Taylor says:

“I challenge you to all out life…We are gathered here today to get it right,
Repeat after me:
‘I will not celebrate mediocrity
I will not worship empty shells
I will not listen to worthless noises
I will not subject myself to selected, predictable choices…’“

Jesus would stand and applaud this call to real life. After all, it was Jesus who also:

• rejected worthless worship (Matt. 21:12-13)
• desired for people to know the true and living God, not “empty shells” (Jn. 4:23-24; 17:2-3)
• lived, taught, breathed, and shared “all out life,” or “eternal life” (Luke 10:25–28; Jn. 10:27-28)

Where Jesus and Slipknot part ways is their pathways towards “all out life.” Slipknot imagines a world of mostly pain and anger, where man is at the center. And in this way, they share a lot with Bonnie Blue. Jesus would gently grab Corey Taylor’s shoulder and say, “This hate is too heavy to carry and will not lead you or others to life—surrender it all to love and being loved.”

Which Path to Take?

So, what’s the point of all this? Have we only concluded that people choose to live their lives differently and still arrive at what they see as “happiness?”

Here’s the upshot: not all pathways to happiness are equal.

The Western pathway is often colored with individualism and an assumed ability to buy or climb our way to the life we want. But that doesn’t work for much of the world.

Many in the Global South, South Asia, or other developing parts of the world cannot simply “wish upon a star” or TikTok their way to happiness. They are contending with poverty, slavery, scarcity, and other challenges. What’s more, other parts of the world are more concerned with their community and family than we are in the West.

In short, Jesus’ way towards happiness is a truer and better way because it considers “the other:”

• God, as “other” than us and central to the universe as Father, provider, and Lover
• People, as the “other” Jesus calls our “neighbor”

Any pathway to “happiness” that does not envisage “the other” and creates barriers to entry too high for the rest of the world is not worth pursuing. It’s too weak, too narrow.

In the coming weeks, we’re going to continue diving into Jesus’ pathway to happiness, how we can live it, and the hope it gives to our world and the world around us.

So, pull up a chair, grab a drink, and join me.